College has always been a hard thing for me, from the very beginning. Coming from a disadvantaged background, I felt alienated right away. I didn’t understand how my peers could have such a beefy endowment from their parents that they could spend money like it was water. I struggled a lot my first year feeling insecure about my socioeconomic background. I felt like an outcast, a poor outcast.
This year is no different. On the first day of class, I observed everyone with their new shoes and clothes, new hairdos and brand new laptops, iPads. I was wearing an outfit that I knew I had to take back to the store the following day because paying for it had virtually zeroed out my bank account. My credit card is maxed out and all I can afford are threads from the thrift store, some of them I change the tag on so they can be $2 instead of $4 because that’s how close my back is to the wall. It’s hard to not feel alienated on campus when so many people come from money. It seems so trivial now that I’m expressing it externally, but it has been a hug source of shame and struggle. When others could fly home on a moments notice, I was stuck on campus for the holidays because neither I nor my parents had enough money to buy a place ticket. When other people got surprise visits from their family, I felt even more lonely because my parents hadn’t been to campus since Accepted Students Day when I was still in high school.
Being in Dr. Patton’s class, I came to feel like none of this really mattered. In this class, everyone gets the same materials in our backpack that our professor gave us. We all have tripods and selfie lights. Dr. Patton paid for all of our textbooks for the semester.
In this class, I feel seen. I feel like I can be honest about who I am and what I’m interested in. I see that Dr. Patton cares about the youth in a way that many other professors don’t. It feels to me that she cares a lot about our futures and our advancement. Being a senior, this class and Dr. Patton have the potential to be amazing resources for me. I have already learned a lot and gained so much from only two class sessions. Dr. Patton expressed constantly how dedicated she is to giving us the skills, connections, and resources we need to formulate a career in the world after undergrad. I’m very grateful that I decided to register for this class at the last minute and I’m looking forward to the rest of my life.
Around The Way with Alexsis 